I know, I know, I said Rock of Ages and love in the same sentence, but don’t worry I am just a virulently opposed to that show being on the Broadway stage as I ever have been – actually probably more so now that I know just how stupid the story is. But last night I went with some friends to the latest show of the movie armed with some strong bottles of Diet Coke… and I have to admit that I really did love Rock of Ages the movie. There are 5 main reasons.
1. The partnership between Alec Baldwin and Russel Brand. Also just Russel Brand in general. He was essentially playing himself, and Alec was essentially playing confused – maybe he was confused about how he had ended up in this movie? I don’t know I don’t care – they were amazing.
2. I love cheesy 80s music, I love cheesy mashups. This movie combines those two things expertly. “We Built This City” mashed up with “Hit Me With Your Best Shot”? Yes, please. And this also speaks to my reason for being fine with the movie, while still hating the show on principle. Jukebox musicals, even the best ones, take up a stage that could be showcasing the work of really creative songwriters…I would rather have those original shows be on Broadway. But a popcorn movie is under no obligation to impress me with its insight or ingenuity, it just needs to entertain me – and RoA is really entertaining.
3. Tom Cruise plays high the whole time. It’s kind of epic. Also he looks way too good for his age – it’s unnatural:
4. As the snark-masters over at Television Without Pity tweeted, “When it comes to acting what Rock of Ages shows us is that Julianne Hough is a really pretty woman.” Same could be said for Diego Boneta (with the gender flipped of course) but their cheery, toothpaste commercial perma-expressions totally worked for this, and added to the movie’s campy appeal for me.
5. This baboon is an amazing actor.
Before the movie was halfway through my friends and I had already decided that we are going to be having sing-a-long parties with this movie for years to come. If you like camp and 80s music – you have to go.